Dare2Diva is Grateful

Universe, I am sorry for not showing gratitude yesterday. I was so incredibly exhausted that I didn't think I could sit at my computer. Today hasn't been much better. I slept until almost 1pm, with a few interruptions, and I haven't really moved from the lounge all day. I am hoping the blood tests I had done reveal the reason behind my exhaustion when I get results on Monday. Universe 1) I am grateful I was able to get back to sleep after waking up throughout the night 2) I am grateful I managed to get some catch up sleep last night 3) I am grateful I had nothing planned today so I could just sit on the lounge 4) I am grateful I had recorded some tv shows so I had something to watch without having to deal with the dvd player in the lounge 5) I am grateful for the beautiful weather today. Sure I didn't go outside to enjoy it but I was nice and warm in my house and I opened up the house which gave me the smell of summer/bush fires. There is something about the smel

I hate to say it but I am really struggling with this lack of sleep. I am trying to stay positive but it just isn't happening. Today was RUOK day where you are supposed to ask people if they are ok and provide a listening ear. I have real trouble with this. I can guarantee that if everyone that asked the question via facebook actually gave a shit and was prepared to hear the answer no, I'm not ok then there would be less people who felt alone, less people who felt hopeless, helpless, sad, pathetic and suicide would drop. I was annoyed by this campaign today but I guess I would have been annoyed by anything. Universe 1) I am grateful I was able to drag myself out of bed to go to work today even with the lack of sleep I have been having. 2) I am grateful for the large bottle of water I keep beside my bed. The increase in meds makes me really thirsty and I didn't have to go anywhere but my bedside table for a drink. 3) I am grateful for the time I allowed myself to have m

Not such a great day for me today so I will just get straight into things. Universe 1) I am grateful that while I woke up at 1:20 and couldn't get back to sleep, I was able to watch some dvd's so I didn't get anxious about not sleeping. 2) I am grateful I got to work safely, calmly and quickly this morning 3) I am grateful for the coffee I made when I got to work 4) I am grateful I had a good meeting today in the city with a number of general managers and I was able to conduct myself intelligently. 5) I am grateful I got to my interview with plenty of time to spare. 6) I am grateful I didn't have to wait around too long for public transport to get me to my car and I am grateful that there was no heavy traffic on the road meaning I got home quickly. Blessings

SO waking up at 2am and starting the day in a bad mood really set the tone. I did get a good run into work which was good. I kept busy which is important. I booked an interview with the recruitment agency for tomorrow afternoon which is yet another positive step for me. I had a great lunch but I just felt quite down and negative. I am going to allow the rest of tonight to be like that but I will sleep well and will wake up bright, refreshed and positive. Universe 1) I am grateful I made it to work safely and quickly. I had very little sleep and usually I would be fighting to stay awake but that wasn't the case. 2) I am grateful I found extra money in my account that was completely unexpected. 3) I am grateful I had the courage to book an appointment with the agency. 4) I am grateful for my amazing lunch of spinach and rocket salad with parmesan with hard boiled eggs as protein. 5) I am grateful I made it home without to much drama. I was caught in a traffic jam thanks to my

I knew today was going to be a good day when I woke up and didn't have to drag my sorry arse out of bed. Before I drove anywhere I said to myself 'I travel to and from work safely, calmly and quickly'. I can only say that this is some coincidence because I got to work quickly and my usual hectic drive home was calm and quick. I had a lot to occupy my time today which was great so I was never bored, I sent my resume off to a recruitment agency (this is a big step. I have to believe in myself and have faith that I am worthy of a good job) and my contract extension was confirmed until the end of the year. That gives me enough time to either retain my current job or to find a new one. I know that the perfect job is looking for me. I just have to be open to the idea and have faith in my own abilities. I also forgot to mention that I asked for a car space outside my dentist on Saturday. First time around and I didn't get one. I then said thank you for the car space outside th

Days are more difficult when I don't plan anything. My mind has way too much time to think. Todays thought was about loneliness. i am seriously lonely. Sure I am surrounded by my family but I am lonely and it is all self inflicted. I have pushed my friends away because I can't keep up the facade of being fabulous all the time. I don't even know if that is what they want but I don't want to be an emotional burden on friends so it is a standard that I set and know I can't meet. I'm not good in relationships because I have a great need to be alone yet it is what I am trying to avoid. There are times, more frequent these days, where I just need to talk to somebody but unless I am paying somebody to listen, like my therapist or my GP, I don't feel I can and because this need to talk has increased, I retreat more so I don't burden people. I am an independent woman and yet I feel really needy. The more I need people around me, the more I push them away. Self in